Woke up in the morning feeling like P Diddy.. LOL jk. More like woke up with a fuckingg hangover, ughh. I feel a little shitty but I wanted to update a little before I forget everything it is I wanted to say.
Within the last week, I found myself sitting back at Eric's house. Funny how we're not together anymore yet it feels like we still are. Maybe it's because when we was together, I was living with him and we had no space. It was constant suffocation. And now it's like damn, I can't have you to myself anymore so let me take advantage of the time I have with you.
Speaking of which, I think it was that Sunday where I came over to see the little one. She's getting so much bigger by the day that it's crazy. And I think we returned her to her grandma on tuesday morning, and that's where he got sick. He puked everything he ate the whole next day. And I was starting to get really worried. That ain't normal, especially when you didn't have anything in your stomach. So when it hit 1am, I called the ambulance and took him to the ER. I never assisted anyone to the hospital before, and it was a lil ironic that it was my ex-boyfriend. The nurses at that hospital.. are piece of shits. Someone is fuckingg sick and all they wanted to talk about was what type of insurance he had. Seriously, where's the sympathy?? But yeh, we was there for 5 hours and they had to take his blood TWICE (4 tubes total) and gave him an IV (2 liters). Shit was crazy..
We had a talk about me moving to Cali and coming back to visit. And it got me a lil sad when he told me he needed a nurse since he plans on some surgery in the upcoming month, and by that time I'll be gone.. But he asked me a couple questions, that made me realize that I still wanted him in my life, him and the baby. "Do you think we'll still be friends when you leave?" and I answered YES.
I don't know it was just a sad moment :/
Saturday, January 9, 2010
Friday, January 1, 2010
I Get Up
Hey everyone! Finally 2010 is here. New year, new start, new resolutions, new EVERYTHING. For me, this year is pretty important because it will determine how my life will turn out miles down the road. So I just wanted to vent about a couple things.
One, yes I jz got out of a very long and hard relationship. I know that in the previous entry, I might've said some negative things about him, but it was obviously because I was upset. We're still friends, and even through everything that's happened, I'd prefer that we stay friends than have no relation at all. Maybe it's just me. But I don't really like to kick people out of my life for good. They did come into my life for a reason, right?
Two, I have been spending alot of time with my closest friends and people I haven't seen for quite some time. It feels pretty good to be back in action actually. I guess I'll admit that I put my ex-boyfriend before my friends in a way, and that was probably the reason I felt this sort of "emptiness." But everyone makes mistakes, we live and we learn. And it makes me end every night with a smile, because my girls still love me regardless of what's happened, and I appreciate it and am so thankful to have them in my life. A lot of people change friends every year, but not me. I had the same girls for 5 years, and then meet new faces.
Three, I've been a little bi-polar the last couple days. One day I'll be excited and the next I find myself laying down reminiscing about my life, and feeling a little sadness.. I think it's because I'm glad to have a new start and start over everything in a whole different environment, seeing my family, and just basically getting all my shit together. But at the same time, I am a little sad that I'm leaving behind my friends. My whole life, I been raised here and living in Boston. So I know I will definitely be coming back every couple months or so to visit.
Four, I been stuck in a dilemma for the last whole week. And it's funny bc I haven't even done anything and yet I'm the one to blame.. -.- Shit happens for a reason though right?
Sigh, but yehs I guess that sums up everything I had to say. Well most of it I guess, I'm in a loss for words right now. But I hope everyone had a great New Years!
One, yes I jz got out of a very long and hard relationship. I know that in the previous entry, I might've said some negative things about him, but it was obviously because I was upset. We're still friends, and even through everything that's happened, I'd prefer that we stay friends than have no relation at all. Maybe it's just me. But I don't really like to kick people out of my life for good. They did come into my life for a reason, right?
Two, I have been spending alot of time with my closest friends and people I haven't seen for quite some time. It feels pretty good to be back in action actually. I guess I'll admit that I put my ex-boyfriend before my friends in a way, and that was probably the reason I felt this sort of "emptiness." But everyone makes mistakes, we live and we learn. And it makes me end every night with a smile, because my girls still love me regardless of what's happened, and I appreciate it and am so thankful to have them in my life. A lot of people change friends every year, but not me. I had the same girls for 5 years, and then meet new faces.
Three, I've been a little bi-polar the last couple days. One day I'll be excited and the next I find myself laying down reminiscing about my life, and feeling a little sadness.. I think it's because I'm glad to have a new start and start over everything in a whole different environment, seeing my family, and just basically getting all my shit together. But at the same time, I am a little sad that I'm leaving behind my friends. My whole life, I been raised here and living in Boston. So I know I will definitely be coming back every couple months or so to visit.
Four, I been stuck in a dilemma for the last whole week. And it's funny bc I haven't even done anything and yet I'm the one to blame.. -.- Shit happens for a reason though right?
Sigh, but yehs I guess that sums up everything I had to say. Well most of it I guess, I'm in a loss for words right now. But I hope everyone had a great New Years!
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