Alive

"Everytime the moon shines I become alive." I been quite a vampire these past couple days. I think it's because of the daily coffee I been drinking. & it's weird because I drink it at around 5pm. That explains why my bedtime is always at 3 to 4am -.-

So lately, I been listening to a lot of different music nd through each song I found myself analyzing the lyrics. Idk why I do that but when I listen to a good song, I wud hope it also has good lyrics. After all, whts a good song if it doesn't have good lyrics to go with it, right?

A quote I came across made me ponder alot. "If you stopped caring that quickly, then you never cared to begin with." I believe there is a lot of truth in this. Nowadays, I really hate to talk abt relationships and anything along those lines. But this quote made me stop nd think. Why is it that most relationships I see tend to be more of a one way st? Whtever happened to EQUALLY putting in the work nd effort? I guess that's the main reason why so many relationships fail. One person just suddenly stops caring, while the other tries TWICE as hard to make it work. Bringing me to the final quote "The quickest way to lose something is to want it too much" True yehh? Because if you want something so badly, you'd do anything to get it, evn if it means hurting yurself nd others. Funny how things work lol.

Okay well I guess I'ma wrap things up here. This move did me a great deal of GOOD. No more distractions. I got both hands on the steering wheel nd I'm ready to go (:

The Best of Me

After a lot of thought and talks with my girls, i realized that I was letting my ex control my happiness. At times i would be in the shower reminiscing abt how things should've been, would've been, or could've been. & time and time again i would keep reminding myself, we are NOT in the same state, nor are we together anymore. Why let someone have that power to tell me how im spose to feel. So im gonna be strong and let the fuck go. I'm not gonna waste my time thinking abt the past anymore. I came to cali for a reason, and tht was to fall back on family and form my future, not mope over a past love. Its not gonna be easy, but no more tears are gonna fall, i guarantee it. So heres to a better me. Im not that weak girl you used to know.

Gnite.

California Love

Hey kids! So i been in cali for the past 3 wks or so, and i been feeling pretty happy w the way things are going. This is gonna be a venting entry about PUBLICITY & my 21st bday thats around the corner. Woot Woot!

Well to start off, i`d like to say i had to learn my lesson the hard way tht sometimes, some things are better left unsaid. You shouldn`t broadcast your life or who you`re seeing bc TRUST nd BELIEVE, there are some pretty fucked up people out there that will try to get in your shit and try to fuck it up. So with that, from now on when I talk abt a guy I might pursue (lol pursue, i never used that word before)

As for my 21st birthday, its coming up soon. I'm feeling anxious and excited at the same time because I want everything to go as planned. For now, i have 2 ideas: ONE, is to fly back to Boston to party with my girls. Up until I realized that most of them were under 21 -.- and TWO, is to drive down for 7 hrs to LA and party in Hollywood with my cousins. I still didn't even look at prices for the tickets to Boston so right now I'm not so sure. Oh well, it's still pretty early so we'll see what happens.